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Last edit: <2021-01-04>

fortune quotes


Naïm has a nice gitconfig alias that they use for all their dotfiles repo commits:

[alias]
    cf = !git commit -m \"$(fortune -sn 60)\"

Sometimes nice stuff comes out, sometimes not so nice stuff comes out. This page will be a random 50 fortune quotes (called with the same args) each time the site is generated:

🌱 🌱 🌱

One small step for man, one giant stumble for mankind.

🍁 🍁 🍁

40 isn’t old. If you’re a tree.

🌱 🌱 🌱

A stitch in time saves nine.

🌱 🌱 🌱

Faith is under the left nipple.

– Martin Luther

🌱 🌱 🌱

A yawn is a silent shout.

– G. K. Chesterton

🌱 🌱 🌱

YOW!!! I am having fun!!!

🍀 🍀 🍀

Civilization is fun! Anyway, it keeps me busy!!

🌿 🌿 🌿

There’s always free cheese in a mousetrap.

🍂 🍂 🍂

Consultant, n.:

An ordinary man a long way from home.

🌱 🌱 🌱

I brake for chezlogs!

🍂 🍂 🍂

Employees must wash hands before returning to work.

🌱 🌱 🌱

Succumb to natural tendencies. Be hateful and boring.

🍁 🍁 🍁

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

🌱 🌱 🌱

Accuracy, n.:

The vice of being right

🍂 🍂 🍂

I am NOMAD!

🌿 🌿 🌿

Life is the urge to ecstasy.

🍁 🍁 🍁

Do not use if printed inner seal is broken or missing.

🍁 🍁 🍁

Are we THERE yet? My MIND is a SUBMARINE!!

🌱 🌱 🌱

I am dyslexic of Borg. Prepare to have your ass laminated.

🍀 🍀 🍀

Where do your SOCKS go when you lose them in th’ WASHER?

🍂 🍂 🍂

Paranoia is heightened awareness.

🌱 🌱 🌱

Too ripped. Gotta go.

🍂 🍂 🍂

Cleanse area thoroughly before applying.

🍁 🍁 🍁

I wish you humans would leave me alone.

🍂 🍂 🍂

I’m sorry if the correct way of doing things offends you.

🍂 🍂 🍂

Go on, EMOTE! I was RAISED on thought balloons!!

🌱 🌱 🌱

Be different: conform.

🌿 🌿 🌿

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.

– Storm Jameson

🍁 🍁 🍁

Macho does not prove mucho.

– Zsa Zsa Gabor

🍂 🍂 🍂

Is this TERMINAL fun?

🍀 🍀 🍀

There is nothing wrong with abstinence, in moderation.

🍁 🍁 🍁

Multics is security spelled sideways.

🍀 🍀 🍀

MERYL STREEP is my obstetrician!

🌿 🌿 🌿

I had a lease on an OEDIPUS COMPLEX back in ’81 …

🍂 🍂 🍂

Preserve Wildlife! Throw a party today!

🍂 🍂 🍂

One good turn asketh another.

– John Heywood

🌱 🌱 🌱

For your penance, say five Hail Marys and one loud BLAH!

🍂 🍂 🍂

Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.

🍀 🍀 🍀

When among apes, one must play the ape.

🌱 🌱 🌱

Small is beautiful.

🍀 🍀 🍀

I wonder if I could ever get started in the credit world?

🌱 🌱 🌱

You never get a second chance to make a first impression.

🍁 🍁 🍁

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do.

🌱 🌱 🌱

Love is sentimental measles.

🌱 🌱 🌱

If it ain’t baroque, don’t phiques it.

🌱 🌱 🌱

It is easier to run down a hill than up one.

🌿 🌿 🌿

I’ll say it again for the logic impaired.

– Larry Wall

🍁 🍁 🍁

Remember, UNIX spelled backwards is XINU.

– Mt.

🍁 🍁 🍁

If you don’t drink it, someone else will.

🌱 🌱 🌱

A violent man will die a violent death.

– Lao Tsu