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fortune quotes

Published 2021-01-04, last edit 2021-01-04

NaΓ―m has a nice gitconfig alias that they use for all their dotfiles repo commits: 

[alias]
    cf = !git commit -m \"$(fortune -sn 60)\"

Sometimes nice stuff comes out, sometimes not so nice stuff comes out. This page will be a random 50 fortune quotes (called with the same args) each time the site is generated:

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Youth. It’s a wonder that anyone ever outgrows it.

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If the thunder don’t get you, then the lightning will.

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Money doesn’t talk, it swears.

– Bob Dylan

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Man who sleep in beer keg wake up sticky.

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#+beginquote

1. athener calls Amnesty International House of Pancakes

#+endquote

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WYSIWYG:

What You See Is What You Get.

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Used staples are good with SOY SAUCE!

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This file will self-destruct in five minutes.

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Pay toll ahead.

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A hermit is a deserter from the army of humanity.

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The sun never sets on those who ride into it.

– RKO

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Never trust a computer you can’t repair yourself.

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Fine’s Corollary:

Functionality breeds Contempt.

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Human beings were created by water to transport it uphill.

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The future lies ahead.

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Love means nothing to a tennis player.

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To see a need and wait to be asked, is to already refuse.

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Not exactly as shown.

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It’s a poor workman who blames his tools.

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IBM:

It may be slow, but it’s hard to use.

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over in west Philadelphia a puppy is vomiting …

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This login session: $13.99

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Identify your visitor.

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How wonderful opera would be if there were no singers.

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Famous last words:

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What this country needs is a good five cent nickel.

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“Nuclear war would really set back cable.”

– Ted Turner

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Miller’s Slogan:

Lose a few, lose a few.

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Never let your schooling interfere with your education.

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A kid’ll eat the middle of an Oreo, eventually.

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You might have mail.

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Your fly might be open (but don’t check it just now).

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mummy, n.:

An Egyptian who was pressed for time.

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“I didn’t know it was impossible when I did it.”

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Memories of you remind me of you.

– Karl Lehenbauer

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Oh my GOD – the SUN just fell into YANKEE STADIUM!!

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You love peace.

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Profanity is the one language all programmers know best.

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Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

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Beware of a tall black man with one blond shoe.

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When in doubt, use brute force.

– Ken Thompson

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Riches cover a multitude of woes.

– Menander

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E Pluribus Unix

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Programmers do it bit by bit.

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Tact, n.:

The unsaid part of what you’re thinking.

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Love isn’t only blind, it’s also deaf, dumb, and stupid.

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Do people know you have freckles everywhere?

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It’s a poor workman who blames his tools.

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It’s not easy, being green.

– Kermit the Frog

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Beeping is cute, if you are in the office ;)

– Alan Cox